Love has got to be world's most potent and most volatile emotion. The amazing thing about romantic love is that it is unique for each couple depending upon their relationship dynamics. And every couple's love story has its own graph- the ups vs downs, intense vs indifferent, comfortable vs annoying etc..their love travels through different phases at its own pace and is never static.
If we talk about matured love or love between a couple in their forties, who have been together for a considerable length of time, then it is very different from the puppy love or youthful infatuation between a younger couple.
After years of being together, the attraction and combustion is replaced by compassion and understanding. You don't count the hours to meet at a restaurant looking your best, rather you count the hours when the hubby returns from his office carrying the bakery or stationary stuff you reminded him to bring home. Instead of you rushing to greet him with a warm hug n kiss, it's the kids who overtake you in exchanging pleasantries. Any privacy is no longer sought to jump into the bed for action but to slump down and slowly share the day's hectic happenings. Priorities change gradually and before you realise you become uncle and aunty from Bhaiya and Bhabhi. The wrinkles and grey hair crop up surreptitiously and catch you unawares. Piles of extra kilos surface over the years and you stop weighing yourself for fear of landing into depression.
Life is tougher now but infinitely more fulfilling. From making plans for your own future you shift to planning for your kids' future because you know somewhere you have peaked professionally and personally. At forties, love becomes a homogenous mixture of respect, companionship, appreciation and dependency. The sore points have been sorted out and the irritants ironed over. Trust and loyalty are the two pillars of a long standing relationship. After investing heavily(emotionally and physically) into your partnership you want to keep it going.
Love in forties is stable and secured wherein you bask in your partners care and attention. It's gentle and soothing unlike the brash and fervent youthful love. It completes you and defines you as an altergo of the other.
Life begins at 40s some say, love too comes onto its own during this time after the jittery, nervy, volatile initial years of courtship, matrimony and series of adjustments in your relationship. It settles finally into a soothing, calming presence in life. From occupying the centre stage for years altogether, it receds to the background but does not fade away. It becomes firmer and more grounded. It intensifies into a solid, secure sea with none the nervous energy of youthful spring.
But love till 40s stays strong only if nurtured properly. Negligence and/or bickering takes the sheen away from it and it shrivels up to die forlorn and lonely.
Like life, love is most unpredictable and the only certainty attached with it is its longevity. Love outgrows life and generations and the best love stories are not of your college sweethearts but of you parents and grandparents. Even if procreation is the goal, love gives it a glamorous avatar. Falling in love and making love makes the world go round and are root causes for many of mankind's wars and progress.
There is no debating the power of matured love and like vintage wine, the older it gets, the better it tastes!
Three cheers to LOVE, the elixir of life! Drink it, savour it and preserve it.
